I'm Back.

So it's the 20 15–20 16 school year and I can say from now that this school year has not been anything like what I expected it to be. My AP classes are definitely easier, but my sense of the need to get amazing grades is so much higher that I feel under stress 24/7. This year I embark on two new APs roads which are AP art history and AP seminar. 

So far AP art history with Ms. Falagan has been a roller coaster to say the least. I ended the first quarter with an 89% and a feeling in my stomach that I wanted to die. Not only would Ms. Falagan not bump me up to a 90 which may I add is only 1% higher but the difference between an A and a B. She said "it's because of all the shit I give you".  The class though, is very interesting. I've always been interested in art and learning about it really blends everything together and makes it all makes sense. 

My other AP class (AP seminar) is an absolute joke. I sit in the class every day and wonder what am I doing with my life. I do not have the slightest  idea what the purpose of this cours is and I don't really understand what we're doing half the time. Everything that we do seems so pointless that I feel like throwing myself into the wall. My teacher is a cute little old man with really cool accessories, including any earing.  Although I like his appearance and his personality, his need to rant for over 30 minutes about an irrelevant topic is so blood  curdling that I would rather be back in AP world history.  

But on a brighter note, I feel like my AP exams this year it will be fairly easy. That is of course if Ms. Falagan decides not to retire in January because she's getting surgery since we give her ulcers and are ultimately killing her.  By the way those are her words not mine.  

I hope everyone else started off to an amazing year because God knows I have not. 

I Did It.

Today is the last day of July 2015 and I received my AP scores about 3 weeks ago. Now if we look back on my previous posts you know I was stressed to the max and was prepared to fail if not 1 than both of my AP exams. And today I am here to tell you that I, Michelle Monjarrez, passed not 1 but BOTH of my AP exams. Can I get a HEEEELLLLLLL YEEEEAAAAAAAA? When I saw my scores I was beyond happy and I was filled with satisfaction knowing that the entire year of hard work (and yes I will admit a lot of slacking) payed off. For everyone out there who is about to go into their first AP class, Ill tell you this; you can do it. But only, if you stop being lazy and do some work. I know for sure that if I didn't study like a mad person the whole week before the AP World exam I would have failed. Without a doubt. So work hard because in the end, you're just doing yourself a favor.

PS can we talk about how I received a postcard from Mrs. Farkas (my AP World teacher) congratulating me on passing.? Best. Feeling. Ever.

IM A BACK TO BACK AP EXAM SURVIVOR

I did it. I survived. I didn't die or throw up or have a panic attack and you know I feel kind of okay. SIKE AF. I feel more than okay, I feel on top of the world. I walked into that class and sat in my seat and not gonna lie I never felt more like throwing up. But I didn't. I zoomed through the multiple choice in about 53 minutes leaving me 2 minutes to go back to the ones I had skipped and tidy up my bubbles which looked like zig zags. Some people were stressing about how they didn't finish or thought it was a little hard, but I thought it was pretty easy. (Side note: This exam was not in any way easy. If you just want to take the exam, you're gonna fail. TBH. NGL.) After that, we had a 10 minute break and those were the shortest 600 seconds of my life. Then we all piled up into the classroom and stepped into our desks that were exactly 3 feet apart to take the essay portion of our exam. And I killed it. I made those essays my PERSONAL slave. College board has nothing on me. COME AT ME BRO. I finished and then went back to Farkas's class and ate my weight in bagels, yogurt, and grapes. Then the next day I did it all over again. 

This is just a reminder that you can do this. I almost gave up multiple times and I'm pretty sure I did at one point. But you have to keep looking forward. You have to believe in yourself. Just like Mr. Panton believes in us.

THIS IS IT.

TOMORROW'S THE DAY. THE HIGHLY ANTICIPATED AP WORLD EXAM WILL TAKE PLACE TOMORROW AND I'VE NEVER BEEN MORE STRESSED OUT IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. IT'S DRIVEN ME TO WRITE THIS ENTIRE BLOG IN CAPITAL LETTERS SO YOU CAN FEEL MY ANXIETY. I'VE STUDIED MORE THIS PAST WEEK THAN I HAVE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. I'VE TAKEN ABOUT 3 PRACTICE EXAMS AND FINALLY MANAGED TO ACHIEVE A 71% YESTERDAY. WHAT DAY WAS YESTERDAY? TUESDAY A.K.A. TWO DAYS BEFORE THE BIG DAY. PEOPLE ARE SAYING NOT TO STRESS BUT HOW COULD I NOT WHEN I'VE DEVOTED MY ENTIRE YEAR AND RUINED MY GPA JUST FOR THIS 3 HOUR AND 5 MINUTE EXAM THAT RIGHT NOW FEELS LIKE COULD MAKE OR BREAK MY ENTIRE LIFE. IS THERE SUCH A THING AS ANTI ANXIETY MEDICINE BECAUSE I COULD USE SOME OF THAT. THEY SAY YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO STUDY THE DAY BEFORE YOUR EXAM BUT I CAN'T HELP IT. I NEED TO KNOW EVERYTHING. I NEED TO BE PREPARED. I'VE NEVER FELT MORE UNPREPARED IN MY LIFE!!!! ALL I CAN HOPE IS THAT I AM ACTUALLY THE REINCARNATION OF MS. FARKAS EVEN THOUGH SHE'S NOT DEAD AND THAT IT COMES OUT TOMORROW DURING THE EXAM SO I CAN SLAAAAY.


EVERYONE PRAY FOR ME AND THE REST OF THE POOR NINTH GRADERS ABOUT TO FACE THEIR FIRST AP EXAM WHICH IM SURE 90% OF US ARE NOT MENTALLY PREPARED FOR.

P. S. IF YOU NEVER HEAR FROM ME AGAIN IT'S BECAUSE I HAD A HEART ATTACK DURING THE EXAM AND DIED, CAUSING EVERYONE IN MY ROOM TO PASS. YOU'RE WELCOME.

Palmetto's On Crack

So with the stress of all the AP exams coming up, I understand that people may be a little out of their minds and don't know how to handle things. But seems to be that the entire population of Miami Palmetto Senior High School has turned to fighting each other.

This past week I've seen more fights that I have in my entire life. These fights have been extremely physical and totally dangerous and always end up in these catastrophic results and everybody seems to just stand there and watch. I will never be able to understand how people can cheer other people on that are hurting each other and just stand there and watch and record and not do anything about it. Some people say that it's the "bystander effect"  where everybody thinks that someone else will jump in and do something about it so they just sit back and watch. But I know that this isn't the case. Everybody would rather get together and they might as well just whip out some popcorn because they're watching this as if it's a movie and it's not the lives of two or more actual human beings that are being destroyed in front of their own eyes. Not only are you physically causing harm to another human being that could cause permanent damage, but you're also messing up their lives because they could have to take an AP exam or take an end of course exam or just finish school and they have to finish strong but because you decided to go fight each other over something so petty and stupid that could have resolved another way or just watch them and let them fight and hurt each other, you're not allowing the other person or the people involved to succeed in life. You are literally stopping them from achieving whatever they want to achieve because I promise you that their entire goal in life is not to beat up a kid or to have you watch them beat up a kid or get beaten up.

Nothing disgusts me more than to see the people that I know show videos of other people getting beaten up or say "oh yeah I took this, it was so live" or have them upload it onto their Snapchat story and be proud that they're there witnessing this moment or even worse, worrying about the people fighting scratching your car when they're slamming each others bodies because in their little brains, they think will make history but in reality it will only make history in a negative way. All of these fights that keep coming up at Palmetto will only make everything stricter and will probably end up with severely hurting someone and nothing good come out of them.

As Derek Shepard used to say, "It's a great day to save lives." If  you are ever in the position that you're witnessing a fight or you know that if a fight's going to happen, do something about it and don't just go and watch. Just like you can pick up your phone to press record you can pick up the phone to call someone or call 911 or just knock some sense into them.

See what some Palmetto students have to say about what's going down:

A Little Something-Something

As I was sitting in a yearbook classroom filled with bright minds, I was approached by one in particular. We had met before, hung out a bit, and here we were again. The student wanted to share something with me, and I'm now sharing it with you. Enjoy.

                     What is life?

What are cars

What are clothes 

What is Mars 

What are toes

What is color

What is art

What is humor

What is start

I couldn't tell you what start is but I know it is a thing. Just another thing in this life of things and it is what I had to do at the beginning of this thing

But what is a thing you ask?

I don't think I could tell you what a thing is if I tried but I know I felt something when my best friend had died. 

Something deep down in my heart which appeared when I received the news which led me to consume myself in drugs & booze

What is pain

What is love 

What is disdain

What is above 

What are drugs 

What is booze

What are hugs 

What is a bruise

How do we know what is what 

It is truly a pain in the butt 

But we always figure out a way because without these things we would have nothing to say.  

The uncertainty is unreal but words is something one must feel 

Because words are power

Words are trust

Words are sour

Words are lust 

Words are a must

Words are wisdom

Words are strong 

Words are freedom 

Words are wrong 
Yet again words are always right because without words there would be nothing in sight. 
We would not be able to describe, express, inscribe, impress
Words are life but then again life is just a word and so is word. 
So what gives words these qualities they obtain, there is no real answer 
In anyone's brain.
But to me words are insane and 

They pack more punch than a speeding freight train. 
Because without words I would be nothing. 

Just a grain of sand on this fucking beach with no more importance than a god damn leach. 
Words let me reach 
Words make me big
Words are my niche 
Words can break me like a twig 
Because words are bigger than I'll ever be and they can't be used without a fee

Because life is a word 
And words are my life

Easy Peasy

Why can't every class be like AP Human? Honestly. It's challenging just like every AP class but its manageable. I can walk in there and know I'm going to pass this test and know without a doubt in my mind that I'm going to pass the AP exam.

Mr. Hayduk likes to give us unit tests on vocab. 100 questions, 60 minutes, matching. It's hard and yes you have to put some effort in and study but if you do then you'll see the results. Simple as that. But with other classes, specifically AP World, you can put in all the time in the world and study like there's no tomorrow but guess what it still probably won't pay off. That's the most frustrating feeling in the world.

If every class were like AP human life would be a breeze. Does Mr. Hayduk intimidate the crap out of me? Yes. Do I sometimes get stressed out? Yes. Is it somewhat time consuming? Yes. Do I feel like giving up 24/7? NO! I feel like I can do this and that im not worthless or an idiot. And everyone needs that uplifting feeling especially right after walking out of a class that makes me feel all of those things and more.

The point is, forget AP world and rock on AP human.